Ontfebnab is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, resourceful alligator.

Ontfebnab created the Virgo Supercluster two million years ago.

If you believe in Ontfebnab, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Ontfebnab, he will send you a sign.

Ontfebnab's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Ontfebnab's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat gulls with great respect.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Erect a giant gold sculpture of Ontfebnab in the centre of the settlement.

4. Never wear purple dresses.

5. Always remove shorts before touching copper.