Xintip is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, tiresome capybara.

Xintip created Africa two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Xintip, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Xintip, he will jump up and down on your head.

Xintip's most sacred site is Edenryd in Sweden.

Xintip's Holy Commandments

1. Never record secrets.

2. Never think about dark matter near frogs while wearing black coats and balancing three zinc spheres on your hands.

3. Do not prepare coconuts while wearing scarves.

4. Never stain your face with indigo.

5. Never write about asteroids.