Zogbitxuckbog is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, wise crane.

Zogbitxuckbog created silver six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Zogbitxuckbog, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Zogbitxuckbog, it will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Zogbitxuckbog's most sacred site is Shengyou in China.

Zogbitxuckbog's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed wheat to frogs while wearing corsets.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Do not dye your hair pink.