Natjigsak is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, resourceful deer.

Natjigsak created Europe seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Natjigsak, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Natjigsak, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Natjigsak's most sacred site is Manna in Greece.

Natjigsak's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about moths.

2. Always look after injured bats.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Do not chant at crossroads.

5. Do not count beyond seven during ceremonies.