Dobzimzig is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, tranquil tortoise.

Dobzimzig created a strange quark two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dobzimzig, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Dobzimzig, he will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Dobzimzig's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Dobzimzig's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Never mix coconuts with blood.

3. Never curse while facing east.

4. Put Dobzimzig first in all things.

5. Always act with obedience when addressing strangers.