Fottipxuc is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, staggering monkey.

Fottipxuc created humankind three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fottipxuc, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Fottipxuc, she will destroy your home planet.

Fottipxuc's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Fottipxuc's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Fottipxuc.

3. Never think about nebulae.

4. Do not place corn upon stone.

5. Do not hurt aardvarks.