Tapxenjab is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, moody dingo.

Tapxenjab created tapeworms four years ago.

If you believe in Tapxenjab, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Tapxenjab, she will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Tapxenjab's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Tapxenjab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Never talk about thermodynamics.

3. Never talk about black holes.

4. Never speak at dawn.

5. Fast once a month.