Yokfubfum is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, resourceful snake.

Yokfubfum created everything that exists seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Yokfubfum, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Yokfubfum, he will boil you in a big pot.

Yokfubfum's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Yokfubfum's Holy Commandments

1. Do not place gooseberries upon stone.

2. Badgers are not to be trusted.

3. Yokfubfum loves frogs, so they must be respected.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. You must love Yokfubfum.