Lungedfoss Yamratgen is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, unjust hydra.

Lungedfoss Yamratgen created dark matter three billion years ago.

If you believe in Lungedfoss Yamratgen, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Lungedfoss Yamratgen, she will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Lungedfoss Yamratgen's most sacred site is Aranganur in India.

Lungedfoss Yamratgen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat parsnips.

2. Put Lungedfoss Yamratgen first in all things.

3. Do not utter prayers while touching zinc.

4. Never write about eukaryotes.

5. Retreat if seven geese approach from the south.