Sasnigtin is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, witless shark.

Sasnigtin created the planet Jupiter four million years ago.

If you believe in Sasnigtin, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Sasnigtin, he will turn you into a slug.

Sasnigtin's most sacred site is Anony in Madagascar.

Sasnigtin's Holy Commandments

1. Never speak at dusk.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Never hop in holy places.

4. Never feed lots of gooseberries to snails while wearing turquoise dresses.

5. Never record signs.