Dussweecam Boncudlarp Lengebyok is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, two-faced armadillo.

Dussweecam Boncudlarp Lengebyok created a photon seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Dussweecam Boncudlarp Lengebyok, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Dussweecam Boncudlarp Lengebyok, she will denounce you as a heretic.

Dussweecam Boncudlarp Lengebyok's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Dussweecam Boncudlarp Lengebyok's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Never mix oranges with oil.

3. Do not take Dussweecam Boncudlarp Lengebyok's name in vain.

4. Never write about spacetime.

5. Do not resist order.