Natcarbid is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, selfish shark.

Natcarbid created the Andromeda Galaxy seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Natcarbid, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Natcarbid, she will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Natcarbid's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Natcarbid's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Never go into magenta rooms.

3. Do not utter prayers while touching gold.

4. Never think about archaea.

5. Do not leap at crossroads.