Sitnakyik is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, selfish dingo.

Sitnakyik created the universe seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sitnakyik, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Sitnakyik, she will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Sitnakyik's most sacred site is Temmes in Finland.

Sitnakyik's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about photosynthesis.

2. Always make sure there are no porpoises in a building before entering it.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Hide from red doves for they are unholy.

5. Do not fashion sacred items from bone.