Mumtabvan is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, self-assured ferret.

Mumtabvan created the Black Eye Galaxy nine million years ago.

If you believe in Mumtabvan, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Mumtabvan, he will turn you into a rock.

Mumtabvan's most sacred site is Aranganur in India.

Mumtabvan's Holy Commandments

1. Never speak the names of galaxies aloud.

2. Never mix turnips with blood.

3. Never handle lead while unclean.

4. Do not utter prayers while touching carbon.

5. Never go into orange rooms.