Vabtimvidlaglag is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, amazing rat.

Vabtimvidlaglag created light four years ago.

If you believe in Vabtimvidlaglag, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Vabtimvidlaglag, it will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Vabtimvidlaglag's most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Vabtimvidlaglag's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Learn three new languages a year.

3. Always make sure there are no aardvarks in a room before entering it.

4. Never mark doors with green.

5. Erect a large lead sculpture of Vabtimvidlaglag on top of all buildings.