Bandinyimrow is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, dishonest hamster.

Bandinyimrow created a bottom quark eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bandinyimrow, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Bandinyimrow, she will turn you into a slug.

Bandinyimrow's most sacred site is Saint-Sauvan in France.

Bandinyimrow's Holy Commandments

1. Never prepare grapes during autumn.

2. Hide if four otters approach from the south.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Worship no other gods but Bandinyimrow.