Vabdussrip is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, ill-tempered grasshopper.

Vabdussrip created matter six million years ago.

If you believe in Vabdussrip, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Vabdussrip, it will attempt to scare you with hail.

Vabdussrip's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Vabdussrip's Holy Commandments

1. Always cleanse blood with water.

2. Never point your legs toward the south during prayer.

3. Always look after injured mites.

4. Never gather five moths near towers.

5. Do not make images of living things.