Vadjatflignadtail is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, unjust turtle.

Vadjatflignadtail created an electron four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vadjatflignadtail, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Vadjatflignadtail, she will make you grow a tail.

Vadjatflignadtail's most sacred site is Hoddom in Scotland.

Vadjatflignadtail's Holy Commandments

1. Do not resist balance.

2. Do not place grapes upon stone.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Always help birds.