Sigfitren is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, all-knowing gnu.

Sigfitren created Africa six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sigfitren, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Sigfitren, it will turn you into a small brown duck.

Sigfitren's most sacred site is Finnmark in Norway.

Sigfitren's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Never feed lots of garlic to otters while wearing yellow shirts.

3. Always keep your back turned to the west at sunset.

4. Always make sure there are no rats in a room before entering it.

5. Do not fashion sacred items from stone.