Xemyimlip is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, almighty turtle.

Xemyimlip created the Virgo Supercluster four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Xemyimlip, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Xemyimlip, it will destroy your home solar system.

Xemyimlip's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Xemyimlip's Holy Commandments

1. Xemyimlip must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Never remain kneeling at midnight.

3. Never mix carrots with oil.

4. Do not travel during spring.

5. Do not place limes upon stone.