Neldissmat is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, merciless wren.

Neldissmat created a bottom quark eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Neldissmat, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Neldissmat, it will turn you into a worm.

Neldissmat's most sacred site is Hongcun in China.

Neldissmat's Holy Commandments

1. Always remove shoes before entering holy places.

2. Never speak at dusk.

3. Always obey Neldissmat's priests.

4. Do not study deoxyribonucleic acid on holy days.

5. Do not step barefoot upon brown earth.