Tettinut is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, idiotic rhinoceros.

Tettinut created tapeworms eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Tettinut, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Tettinut, he will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Tettinut's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Tettinut's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in violet rooms.

2. Never mention nematodes.

3. Shun those given to greed.

4. Tettinut loves sheep, so they must be respected.

5. You must love Tettinut.