Fagdaddiss is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, narcissistic bat.

Fagdaddiss created the Tadpole Galaxy eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Fagdaddiss, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Fagdaddiss, he will not invite you to parties.

Fagdaddiss' most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Fagdaddiss' Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Do not eat cucumbers.

3. Always treat whales with great respect.

4. Retreat if three snakes approach from the east.

5. Never wear turquoise boots on sacred days.