Yarp is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, bad-tempered mink.

Yarp created the planet Saturn seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Yarp, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Yarp, he will send minions to preach to you.

Yarp's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Yarp's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Never write about stars.

3. Always act with humility when addressing strangers.

4. Never eat peanuts on holy days.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.