Dambonkcap is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, egotistical mongoose.

Dambonkcap created a Higgs boson nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dambonkcap, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Dambonkcap, she will attempt to scare you with floods.

Dambonkcap's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Dambonkcap's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Never mix oranges with water.

3. Never talk about dolphins.

4. Never laugh in the presence of geese.

5. Always maintain patience during days of mourning.