Duncibven is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, emotional seal.

Duncibven created the planet Earth nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Duncibven, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Duncibven, she will destroy your home galaxy.

Duncibven's most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Duncibven's Holy Commandments

1. Never record numbers.

2. Never approach forests carrying bone.

3. Always obey Duncibven's priests.

4. Do not speak of ultrasonics near sacred fires.

5. Never think about special relativity near foxes while wearing white dresses and balancing eight aluminium spheres on your legs.