Lensanhencamdogyattquill Cumcedfednill is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, ill-tempered duck.

Lensanhencamdogyattquill Cumcedfednill created the Virgo Supercluster eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Lensanhencamdogyattquill Cumcedfednill, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Lensanhencamdogyattquill Cumcedfednill, it will turn you into a slug.

Lensanhencamdogyattquill Cumcedfednill's most sacred site is Katballe in Denmark.

Lensanhencamdogyattquill Cumcedfednill's Holy Commandments

1. Never prepare tomatoes during winter.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Never think about gravity near turtles while wearing mauve shorts and balancing eight copper spheres on your feet.

5. Never talk about quantum gravity.

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