Stragkanxin is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, staggering gorilla.

Stragkanxin created the Andromeda Galaxy four years ago.

If you believe in Stragkanxin, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Stragkanxin, it will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Stragkanxin's most sacred site is Finnmark in Norway.

Stragkanxin's Holy Commandments

1. Never mark doors with yellow.

2. Never tolerate songs in holy places.

3. You must never eat onions.

4. Do not hurt porpoises.

5. Pray towards the north.