Baggonsaf is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, quiet wren.

Baggonsaf created an electron five billion years ago.

If you believe in Baggonsaf, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Baggonsaf, he will strike you with lightening.

Baggonsaf's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Baggonsaf's Holy Commandments

1. Never adorn your arms with indigo markings.

2. Never think about electromagnetism near goats while wearing green tights and balancing eight iron spheres on your head.

3. Worship no other gods but Baggonsaf.

4. Never point your legs toward the south during prayer.

5. Always cleanse ash with water.