Tingutgessgebgessgamjigfar is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, capable toad.

Tingutgessgebgessgamjigfar created a charm quark four years ago.

If you believe in Tingutgessgebgessgamjigfar, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Tingutgessgebgessgamjigfar, it will try to impress you with rainbows.

Tingutgessgebgessgamjigfar's most sacred site is Avebury Stone Circle in England.

Tingutgessgebgessgamjigfar's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Never run in the presence of seals.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Do not chant in public.