Raptarcid is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, witty otter.

Raptarcid created the Whirlpool Galaxy two billion years ago.

If you believe in Raptarcid, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Raptarcid, he will turn you into a snail.

Raptarcid's most sacred site is Ulsted in Denmark.

Raptarcid's Holy Commandments

1. Never remain standing at dusk.

2. Do not travel during summer.

3. Do not speak sacred words in winter.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never look at stars.