Latjatcuss is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, two-faced faun.

Latjatcuss created gold three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Latjatcuss, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Latjatcuss, she will not care.

Latjatcuss' most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Latjatcuss' Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about limes.

2. Never sit near sheep.

3. Walk at least three thousand metres per day.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Latjatcuss must be the most important thing in your life.