Haphatgon is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, omniscient snail.

Haphatgon created the Tadpole Galaxy nine million years ago.

If you believe in Haphatgon, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Haphatgon, he will be very unhappy.

Haphatgon's most sacred site is Zlatolist in Bulgaria.

Haphatgon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak sacred words in winter.

2. Never speak at midday.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Never look at nebulae.

5. Do not dye your hair green.