Cunsidgum Tipsaskar is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, fussy crab.

Cunsidgum Tipsaskar created the Andromeda Galaxy nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cunsidgum Tipsaskar, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Cunsidgum Tipsaskar, he will denounce you as a heretic.

Cunsidgum Tipsaskar's most sacred site is Saint-Sauvan in France.

Cunsidgum Tipsaskar's Holy Commandments

1. Never bounce in the presence of nematodes.

2. Do not hurt great tits.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Never remain bowed at midday.

5. Do not speak of the weak nuclear force near sacred fires.