Lagrillnib is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, witty meerkat.

Lagrillnib created the Cigar Galaxy twelve years ago.

If you believe in Lagrillnib, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Lagrillnib, it will turn you into a mouse.

Lagrillnib's most sacred site is Saint-Sauvan in France.

Lagrillnib's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat cucumbers.

2. Never talk about fluid mechanics near sheep while wearing purple jumpers.

3. Never talk about archaea.

4. Do not speak of the strong nuclear force near sacred fires.

5. Never allow mites to witness sacred rites.