Zimpidweg is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, omniscient fairy.

Zimpidweg created the Large Magellanic Cloud four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Zimpidweg, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Zimpidweg, he will laugh at you.

Zimpidweg's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Zimpidweg's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the north.

2. Never gather nine porpoises in one place.

3. Never talk about sheep.

4. Erect a giant black sculpture of Zimpidweg in the centre of the settlement.

5. Never remain bowed at midnight.