Titdunquillsawriggodstig is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, cheerful hamster.

Titdunquillsawriggodstig created matter four billion years ago.

If you believe in Titdunquillsawriggodstig, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Titdunquillsawriggodstig, he will think nothing of it.

Titdunquillsawriggodstig's most sacred site is Quenstedt in Germany.

Titdunquillsawriggodstig's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear red.

2. Never mix wheat with oil.

3. Always look after injured snakes.

4. Never talk about pigs.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.