Vabbepsaf is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, slow alligator.

Vabbepsaf created viruses six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vabbepsaf, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Vabbepsaf, she will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Vabbepsaf's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Vabbepsaf's Holy Commandments

1. Never curse while facing west.

2. Paint representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Always cleanse blood with water.

4. Never wear dresses.

5. Never hurt rats.