Bedkabgeb is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, grumpy hyena.

Bedkabgeb created dark energy five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bedkabgeb, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Bedkabgeb, she will destroy your favourite solar system.

Bedkabgeb's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Bedkabgeb's Holy Commandments

1. Never chant in the presence of horses.

2. Bedkabgeb must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Shun those given to vanity.

4. You must pray to Bedkabgeb five times a day.

5. Always help ducks.