Tadarm is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, overgenerous badger.

Tadarm created time and space three million years ago.

If you believe in Tadarm, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Tadarm, it will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Tadarm's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Tadarm's Holy Commandments

1. Do not study photosynthesis on holy days.

2. Always help cats.

3. Never speak the names of asteroids aloud.

4. Never talk about solid mechanics near dogs while wearing indigo kilts and balancing nine platinum spheres on your head.

5. Do not trade with those who eat rice.