Dadtimlam is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, confident goblin.

Dadtimlam created water two million years ago.

If you believe in Dadtimlam, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Dadtimlam, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Dadtimlam's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Dadtimlam's Holy Commandments

1. Always remove rings before touching nickel.

2. Never look at asteroids.

3. Learn five new languages a year.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Dadtimlam.