Lopbissbenvab is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, sapient coyote.

Lopbissbenvab created energy eight million years ago.

If you believe in Lopbissbenvab, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Lopbissbenvab, it will turn you into a dog.

Lopbissbenvab's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Lopbissbenvab's Holy Commandments

1. Lopbissbenvab loves dolphins, so they must be respected.

2. Always face the south before speaking sacred words.

3. Always count to four before sleeping.

4. Do not hop in public.

5. Never discuss photosynthesis in public assemblies.