Fonxincud is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, humorless scorpion.

Fonxincud created oxygen three million years ago.

If you believe in Fonxincud, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Fonxincud, he will turn you into a slug.

Fonxincud's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Fonxincud's Holy Commandments

1. Never pray while filled with joy.

2. Retreat if seven tortoises approach from the east.

3. Worship no other gods but Fonxincud.

4. Erect a large lead sculpture of Fonxincud on top of all buildings.

5. Erect a giant mauve sculpture of Fonxincud in the centre of the settlement.