Bidstafmot Quatrilgenman is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, self-assured naga.

Bidstafmot Quatrilgenman created gold two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bidstafmot Quatrilgenman, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Bidstafmot Quatrilgenman, she will destroy your home solar system.

Bidstafmot Quatrilgenman's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Bidstafmot Quatrilgenman's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Hide if nine dogs approach from the west.

3. Do not kill tapirs.

4. Remain bowed during prayer.

5. Bidstafmot Quatrilgenman loves monkeys, so they must be honoured.