Pomtimdin is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, sage troll.

Pomtimdin created viruses nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Pomtimdin, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Pomtimdin, he will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Pomtimdin's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Pomtimdin's Holy Commandments

1. Always help mice.

2. Heed all portents.

3. Never run in holy places.

4. Do not wear skirts marked with mauve.

5. Never think about dwarf planets.