Sigstip is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, loving turtle.

Sigstip created the planet Saturn two million years ago.

If you believe in Sigstip, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Sigstip, she will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Sigstip's most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Sigstip's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear silver on your body.

2. You must pray to Sigstip four times a day.

3. Do not eat gooseberries.

4. Always wash your back before prayer.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.