Zimquimvonk Fidcatpan Fagminbabfas is a god.

She takes the form of an one thousand metre long, unselfish raccoon.

Zimquimvonk Fidcatpan Fagminbabfas created vertebrates three million years ago.

If you believe in Zimquimvonk Fidcatpan Fagminbabfas, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Zimquimvonk Fidcatpan Fagminbabfas, she will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Zimquimvonk Fidcatpan Fagminbabfas' most sacred site is Troms in Norway.

Zimquimvonk Fidcatpan Fagminbabfas' Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Never look at planets.

3. Zimquimvonk Fidcatpan Fagminbabfas must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Never go into turquoise rooms.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.