Sasdumtik is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, humorless toad.

Sasdumtik created the planet Earth seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sasdumtik, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Sasdumtik, it will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Sasdumtik's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Sasdumtik's Holy Commandments

1. Always help eagles in need.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Never wear green dresses on sacred days.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Never look at stars.