Jonjatdin is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, grumpy raccoon.

Jonjatdin created the Small Magellanic Cloud nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Jonjatdin, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Jonjatdin, she will send you a strongly worded letter.

Jonjatdin's most sacred site is Kirumampakkam in India.

Jonjatdin's Holy Commandments

1. Always cleanse your hands after touching nickel.

2. Never wear red shoes.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Never talk about quantum mechanics.

5. Never think about bacteria.