Shavfodcab Sawablig is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, blissful monkey.

Shavfodcab Sawablig created an electron five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Shavfodcab Sawablig, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Shavfodcab Sawablig, he will say rude things about you at parties.

Shavfodcab Sawablig's most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Shavfodcab Sawablig's Holy Commandments

1. Never mark doors with gray.

2. Never pray while filled with joy.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate goats.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Pray only in firelight.